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Walter (Joel Harris) is a lodge member who took over in the Adventures With Bill segments. He considers himself a handyman and possesses extraordinary physical strength, which is due in part to the fact that he does not have a girlfriend. He shares many traits in common with Bill including being accident prone, rarely speaking, and very rarely appearing outside the "adventures" segments. In the episode "The IQ Test", we learn that Walter is a police officer by trade.

Walter appears in seasons 9 through 14.

Joel Harris, who played Walter, was also the show's stunt coordinator.

"If that unit hits Dead Man's Curve at over 55, there's gonna be a bloodbath. Well, some kind of bath." - Walter's only known onscreen lines, in "The IQ Test"