|1st Season, Episode 7 (Transcript | Credits)|
The Lodge plays host to a He-Man competition.
Cast (in order of appearance): Harold Green, Red Green, Hap Shaughnessy, Bill Smith, Jack the Hermit, Old Man Sedgewick (mentioned), Moose Thompson (mentioned), Buster Hadfield (mentioned), Stinky Peterson (mentioned), Junior Singleton (mentioned)
See also: Transcript
Plot: Red announces that there is going be a He-Man contest, with the prize being a truss. This contest has each participant make up their own event that they would have to do themselves for safety's sake. The first event in the contest was where members had to take their teeth out, stand on them and put them back in their mouth. Next, there was a beer-chugging contest. Finally, there was Red's personal inclusion in the event: a race over a hundred yards backwards through the woods blindfolded, which caused Junior Singleton to get lost.
Red's Campfire Songs #1: Red's dad's old wood stove.
Handyman Corner: Red makes a reclining chair out of a stove.
Red and Harold On Life #1: Red and Harold discuss a bad check they saw in a hockey game.
Red's Poetry #1 (The Winter of Our Discount Tent): Getting hit in the face with a snowball.
Visit With Hap Shaughnessy: Hap claims to have been a bush pilot, using a real bush made into a raft to pilot felled trees to a sawmill.
Red's Campfire Songs #2: Lumberjack Mort.
Male Call: Red and Harold try to answer some personal letters.
Adventures With Bill: Bill tries to build an igloo.
Red's Poetry #2 (The Winter of Our Discount Tent): Red accidentally putting a dog instead of a log on the fire.
Harold's Segments: Harold talks shopping with your mom.
Red and Harold On Life #2: Red complains that too many people with university degrees know nothing about life.
Visit With Jack the Hermit: Jack explains to Red about his idea about being a survivalist.
- Bill removes the long knife from out of his pants.
- Red gives Jack the Hermit some coupons for McDonald's.
- The coupons are for McRibs, which is usually sold at the restaurant for only limited amounts of time at any one time.