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3rd Season, Episode 57 (Transcript | Credits)
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The lodge hopes to be classified as a recreational tourist attraction in order to receive a grant from the government.

Cast (in order of appearance): Red Green, Harold Green, Dougie Franklin, Ranger Gord, Stinky Peterson (mentioned), Buster Hadfield (mentioned), Moose Thompson (mentioned), Bill Smith, Hap Shaughnessy

DVD: Red Green – The Infantile Years

Watch the episode on YouTube

Segment Summary[]

See also: Transcript

Plot: Red announces that he has received a government application in the mail, which indicates the lodge might get a grant for $50,000 if they can get themselves classified as a recreational tourist attraction. Harold, however, warns Red that he will be betraying the free market capital system if he does this. Soon after, the lodge starts cleaning up the environment, but Harold worries that the clean-up might exceed the grant funds. Eventually, they do receive the government grant, but Red decides not to show it off until the Lodge Meeting.

Red's Campfire Songs #1: How Red learned how to swim.

Handyman Corner: Red replaces the webbing in a lawn chair.

The Experts: Dougie advises to spend money on a car instead of on a vacation.

Red's Poetry (Endless Summer): Protecting one's pool from neighbors.

Visit With Ranger Gord: Upon seeing the application form, Gord tells Red that the lodge will need to clean up any environmental fractions to receive the grant.

Red's Campfire Songs #2: A guy named Dave who came up to the area to camp without wearing pajamas.

Adventures With Bill: Bill accidentally gets the Possum Van stuck in the mud.

Harold's Segments: "Teachers Are People II"

Red's Teen Talk: Red blames Shakespeare for sex and violence.

Visit With Hap Shaughnessy: Hap offers to take Red into town on his boat so he can mail the applicaiton form himself. When Hap learns that the form is for the government, he starts recounting his days as a president, substituting for Nixon, much to Red's consternation.

Fun Facts[]


  • During the closing credits, Mark Wilson (Glen Brachston) and Bruce Hunter (Bob Stuyvesant) are seen at the Lodge Meeting, but they have no lines and are uncredited for this episode.

Real-World References[]

  • During his Advice To Teenagers segment, Red mentions how the works by William Shakespeare pertain to different parts of sex and violence.